Embrace the Mess

The beginning of Hurricane Florence was marked by decisions to be made, preparation, and travel. Each pressing decision added more stress to what was already an overwhelming situation. It was a time when tensions were high and as a result, all kinds of ugly came out. Emotions like fear, annoyance, and selfishness reared their ugly heads. I longed for more peaceful times when I could keep some of my ugly emotions under wraps.

Even once the storm ended, there was still a lot of ugly. As I drove back home after evacuating from Hurricane Florence, my eyes and ears were filled with intense sights and sound. Along the road, power lines sagged under the pressure of the hurricane winds. Neighbors stacked debris up in front of their homes. The roar of chainsaws came to life, in an effort to clear some of the fallen trees. Car horns blared as evacuees broke under the pressure to return home. Fallen dead limbs cluttered once beautiful yards. All around, all I could see was brokenness. Loss. Grief. Emptiness. When would things be back to normal? Former picturesque Jacksonville had been replaced with destruction. Everything in me wanted things back to the way they were before.

When we experience brokenness in our lives, we may wish away the unhappy circumstances. In an attempt to get our hearts back to level ground, we rush the brokenness along. We try to bypass the pain and hurt by speeding ahead to relief.

I’d like to offer 5 reasons we should embrace the mess:

1.     Troubles allow the hidden parts of us to be revealed.

If I’m honest with myself, most of my ugly can stay hidden or covered up during the “normal” times. They still exist, friend. David reminds us in Psalm 139:2, “You know my thoughts before I think them”. Yet still, aren’t we the masters of disguise, able to conceal these prickly thoughts? Nothing hidden can be dealt with. It is the messy times that call my messy emotions out of hiding. Why can I be thankful for this big reveal? Through the unveiling, God can renew these places.

2.     Acknowledgment of weakness activates God’s strength.

Once my thoughts are out of hiding, God can be my strength. God’s grace can strengthen me when my hidden weaknesses are illuminated. Paul uses the word “content” or in the KJV version “take pleasure” when responding to the presence of trails. How can Paul be so positive when he is being insulted, persecuted, and even thrown into prison? The second part of 2 Corinthians 2:10 may give us an answer: “For when I am weak, then I am strong”. This strength that Paul speaks of can only be accessed when we acknowledge our weakness. Often as long as we think we can take care of our problems, God allows us. Once we acknowledge our weaknesses, God can and will be our strength.  

3.     God-reliance marks the life of a mature believer.

As people who operate in a culture that values self-reliance, it can be so counter-intuitive to be God-reliant. We think if we can be more independent, we will have more worth. Yet in the midst of that thinking, God says, “For I am the Lord your God, who upholds your right hand” (Isaiah 41:13). The trial leads me to acknowledge who has been in control from the beginning of time. We think the mark of a mature believer is being independent of God; yet, maturity in Christ is increased and total dependence on God (Enduring Word). The trials invite us to step out into the unknown, confident that God’s strength and grace are sufficient. 

4.     We may miss the message by rushing to get out of the mess.

Most good messages are communicated best through a mess. Many kids never learn a lesson until they experience some kind of a mess. It took me falling down the steps face-first onto the pavement (the day before picture day, nonetheless!) to learn not to carry too much at a time. Without that mess and oh was it a mess (sorry mom and dad for my Spring 1998 school photo!), I would not have received the message that I am not Wonder Woman. Our ears seem to be a little more in tune to God when we are in a mess. This might be because we are finally to the end of our ideas and ourselves. Many thanks to our Father for patience during the times we tune out His message because we think we’ve got everything under control.

5.     Old diseased things must be uprooted before new things can grow.

Garden analogies are not lost on me, despite my lack of a green thumb. As I was working to uproot dead bushes, I had a startling revelation. The dead bushes had not only become an eyesore to the neighborhood but were also spreading contamination through the root system to healthy plants. Am I happy that my once beautiful shrubs were now brittle leafless blobs? No, of course not. But, by the process of death, I now have the chance to grow something new in its place. New life can grow once the dead places in our life are uprooted. Is there an attitude, thought pattern, behavior that needs to be put to death? Dear friend, it may be a painful and difficult uprooting process. Don’t lose hope; just think of what new attitudes, thoughts, and behaviors can now grow in the room you have created!

As I continue to experience the after effects of the storm, I can thank God for the mess. It is true that the rushing wind and crashing waves did damage to the place I call home. The storm even wreaked havoc on my emotions. The calm comes when I remember the God who stills the waves is my help during the mess. Charles Spurgeon said about the necessity of trials (mess), “The worst form of trial may nevertheless be our best present portion.” Let’s not rush the trial away, but allow God to be our present help in the messy places. 

Giving Thanks in the Darkness

I sat sad, overwhelmed with the weight of life. I felt God calling me to be thankful. “God, what do I have to be thankful for? Don’t you see what I’m going through?” I said back. I felt God saying to me that not only did He see what I was going through, but He also desired to be a part of it. He seemed to see thanksgiving as the solution to part of my problem. My withholding of thanksgiving prevented me from seeing God at work. As I began to give thanks, even when I didn’t feel like it, I could start to see God’s light at work in my situation.

Here are some practical things you can choose to be thankful for in the darkness:

1.     In the darkness, His light shines brightest.

Have you ever noticed when life is sun-shiny, it’s easy to forget God? It’s as if the brightness from the good things can distract us from the glory of God. We can lose sight of who deserves the praise. We can begin to think that it is because of our efforts that life is going so well. When life begins to darken because of circumstance, we are more likely to seek God’s light. We long for a glimmer of the goodness of God. John 1:5 says, “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it” (ESV). Jesus’ light came to us in our darkest hour; He was the only hope for our eternity. How much more can He show up in our dark season? The light of God draws us when we are walking through gloomy days.

2.     Darkness gives us a point of reference.

During a troubling season, it is really difficult to see a future. It is hard to see any path out of the difficult time you are going through. Once you are on the other side of your struggle, you will be reminded of God’s faithfulness. It will give you a reference point to look back on and say, “God you were there with me then, and you’ll be with me now.” You will be able to confidentially say, “I sought the Lord, and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears” (Psalm 34:4 ESV). When we go through difficult times and God remains faithful, we can be expectant that He will do it, again.

3. Darkness causes us to test our faith.

One of the most beneficial things about the darkness is the way that it has the ability to strengthen our faith. When we are going through trials, we have to really come to terms with the things we believe about God. We wrestle through questions of God’s goodness, faithfulness, mercy, sovereignty, and love. Often times, the darkness gives us motivation to really struggle with big questions about our God. I think perhaps we avoid asking these questions when life is going well. The dark times really prompt us to be confident in what we believe. Peter speaks of the living hope we have to hold onto. He says, “In this [reserved inheritance] you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith-more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire-may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ” (1 Peter 1:6-7 ESV). How much more do we trust in God once we have gone through a testing and He has proven to be trial-proof?  At the end of the test, we can know there is no trial our God cannot overcome.

4.     Darkness gives birth to new habits.

Stick with me on this one. In the darkness, habits are formed: potentially positive or negative. When you are going through more than you can handle, you are either going to respond by clinging to God or turning away to other things. In the midst of a recent trial, I found myself longing for more time with God. I felt like I needed that time more to function through my struggles. I started turning off the radio in the car so I could talk to God. I began longing to just be quiet and reflect on God’s goodness. These habits did not develop when my life felt in control. It was trials that led me to seek God’s face regularly. My prayers sounded a lot like David’s when he said, “Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted” (Psalm 25:16 ESV). God desires this type of prayer to become habitual. We can thank God when trials come and our response is to seek our Father fervently.

A lot of us are trying to pray away the darkness. Maybe God is trying to reveal a side of us that doesn’t trust Him. He might be trying to get us ready for something bigger than ourselves. Perhaps, our habits and attitudes need shifting. Instead of praying for the removal of trials, maybe we should instead be thanking God in the midst of them for His ever-present help.